The secret to an unforgettable Holiday Party?

It can be frightfully complicated with countless details, and yet remarkably simple. Right now perhaps, during the Holidays, many hosts are contemplating this question.

Throughout the year, patrons call me about upcoming fêtes they are hosting. Initially their focus is on the wine to be served (thankfully Hafner!) but the conversation often turns to other details and ideas. These conversations are delightfully fun and creative, and a window into patrons’ special celebrations.
To answer the question in the title, I asked several veteran party givers for their suggestions on throwing a memorable Holiday party at home. One patron, a former Alaska journalist now in Minnesota, had helpful advice based on years of throwing and attending all sorts of parties. Her thoughts follow:

A few years back, just minutes after stepping into our home and its “Christmas Soirée” from a freezing mid-December Minnesota night, the newly hired financial associate in my husband’s department stopped suddenly — equidistant from the Christmas tree and dining room table, both decked out in Yuletide finery. “Can’t you feel it?” she asked, “Feng shui!”

She whipped out her cell phone, took a picture, and sent it off to China, hoping her mother might feel the domestic ancestral harmony even thousands of miles away.

Indeed, what unseen forces combined to make this newcomer delight in the holidays? Our (to put it kindly) eclectic Christmas tree? Or maybe the brilliant feast spilling onto the green tartan tablecloth filled with specialties from pesto salmon to Italian torta, conjured up from Francesca, whose culinary magic has graced our parties for three decades.

The question (what makes a party special?) is complex. To answer I thought I would share what I have gleaned over the years from guests, which appear to fall into three categories:

Anticipation and Excitement: “Do you hear that, that buzz,” our Irish friend asked her husband from the sidewalk before ringing our doorbell. “Now, that’s a party!” That excitement started with an invitation — hand addressed — that tells its recipients they are special, and the hosts cannot wait to see them. No need to bring anything, not work related or tied to a charity, just a special night where hopefully everyone connects and enjoys themselves. And, absolutely, dress up, it’s a party!

The second essential piece to a perfect party is feeling welcome enough to come inside, “break bread” with other guests, and, maybe make a connection that surprises. Some stroll straight into the kitchen where a bartender is serving Hafner Chardonnay (mais, oui!). Others sit in the living room surrounded by friends they have known for years. Later, as guests say goodnight, gather their coats (and hopefully grab a pretty French soap from a glass bowl near the doorway), you wish them Merry Christmas and hope they have had a lovely night.

And, if a host is lucky enough, someone will share something later, that illustrates the third proof that a party was special — something happens the host has nothing to do with. For one neighbor, whose husband was at home ill that evening, it was Suri, a lovely waitress we all know, greeting guests and taking coats at the door. Our neighbor said “I have never gone to a Christmas party alone before, and it was so wonderful to be greeted by a friend.”

Sometime later, another friend who had lost her husband a few months after our party, confided: “You know, your party was the last time he said he felt normal, surrounded by friends, and happy.”

Indeed, my dearest friend succinctly shared with me many years ago the secret to a perfect party: “Just set the stage, Julie, and get out of the Spirit’s way!”

I hope Julie’s answer to the title question provoked smiles, nods of agreement and perhaps an “aha”. If you have an answer to the question, please email me. We know that every party is as individual as the host and guests, and we relish hearing your thoughts!

And as always, thank you for serving Hafner wines to your friends and family!